One of the amazing gifts that we have as people is the desire to
have dreams of a better life, and the ability to establish goals
to live out those dreams. What is even more amazing is that we
have also been given the ability to not only dream but to pursue
those dreams and not only to pursue them, but the ability to
actually set goals to achieve those dreams.
I did so much of my Christmas shopping this year online. It has
dawned on me that setting and achieving goals really is as
simple a process as placing an order. Therefore, when you now
complete each of the following steps in this ordering process,
it becomes a bit like ordering your goals!
Suppose I have set myself a goal to reduce my weight by 3
kilograms during the month of January. I compare the online DVD
store to Life's Amazing Virtual Goal Delivery System and am
delighted to say that if you follow these steps, your New Year
resolutions are in the bag!
The first Step: Decide what you want.
Take some quality time out for yourself to be quiet. This is
something that hardly any of us do enough of in our busy lives.
Your heart and mind really do enjoy times of quiet.
Think about what really thrills you. When you are quiet, think
about those things that really get your blood moving. What would
you LOVE to do, either for fun or for enhancing the quality of
your life? What would you love to accomplish? What would you try
if you were guaranteed to succeed? What big thoughts move your
heart into a state of excitement and joy? When you answer these
questions you will feel Great and start becoming aware of what
your goals are and of course what they should be.
Life is too short to not pursue your dreams. Those who dream,
who set goals and act on them to live out their dreams are those
who live lives of joy and have a sense of peace when they near
the end of their lives.
So, back to the online goal ordering system; I cannot and do not
expect the online DVD company to send me a film before I have
actually sent them my request, neither should you expect life to
supply the resources to stop smoking or reduce weight for
example. So, choose the outcome that you require so that it can
be ordered.
In order to do this ensure that you do get a vivid, sensory rich
idea on how you want it to be; decide upon what it is that you
really want and then make sure that you do really state it in
the positive. For example "I want to achieve and maintain the
size shape and weight that pleases me" and NOT "I want to lose
some weight".
Your unconscious mind treats negative and positive the same when
it learns, they are not processed by your neurology in the same
way that they are when you say them, for example; If I were to
now say to you: "Don't think of a pink elephant" it is a command
that is very difficult to actually do. In order not to do it,
you have to do it! When someone says "I want to stop lacking
confidence" you have to imagine lacking confidence to understand
the sentence! You are dominating your mind with the thoughts of
the things you do not want.
The Second Step: Get Your Goal In Writing; Make It Real and
Tangible.
Before I can place an order for any DVDs, I had to find the
right order page for the DVD I wanted. However, before I could
find the right order page, I had to type the right key terms
into the search bar. I wouldn't have found the right order page
if I hadn't used the right terms. Wouldn't it have been madness
for me to have typed "NOT The First Star Wars Film and NOT The
second Star Wars Film..." or to have typed in "I do not really
want anything with Jack Nicholson in it..." in my search for the
DVDs I did want? Write what you do want, and be as specific and
particular as you can.
As I have already mentioned, it is a common thing for people to
think about what they want out of life in negative terms. They
talk about "getting out of debt" when they really mean that they
want to experience "financial security and freedom".
Your unconscious mind is going to deliver precisely what you
order. Vague orders bring vague results and we never see the
connection between our requests and what shows up. Too often we
place careless orders unknowingly, and then wonder why things do
not turn out the way we wanted them to. Focusing on "debt"
brings a constant supply of it into your life, even if you are
trying to get rid of it. After all, it's like putting "NOT debt"
into the search tool. You're not looking for the "debt" order
page, so stop using that expression today!
Commit to the thing you want by putting it in writing. It is
like entering it in an imaginary search box. It is also the
fastest way to get to the right order page. One more thing:
write it in present tense as though it has already happened.
Make it happen in the now!
So, maybe your goal statement in writing will be something like,
"January 30th, 2006: I have now reduced my weight by 3kgs."
Getting it in writing automatically takes you to Life's "order
page" but you are not done yet. The DVD is not on it's way until
you have completed the order all the way to the end of the
process.
Third Step: Loading Up Your Shopping Cart.
Now, if you are going to invest your own endeavour on doing
something, you need to have a good reason, so let yourself know
exactly what the reasons are that you want to achieve this goal.
What is it going to get for you? How does it benefit you? What
then becomes possible for you? Allow yourself to really explore
all the benefits that you are going to get from achieving your
goal. The more you do this, the easier it is to be enthusiastic
and motivated about it, and then of course the more your success
is simply inevitable.
In my DVD purchasing experience, after I typed in "Star Wars
Episode Three: Revenge of The Sith" into the websites search
engine, it presented me with a list of "Star Wars" DVDs. Some
were the earlier films. After carefully selecting my specific
choice, I clicked "Add to Shopping Cart." This is a logical
step; after all, I cannot really expect the online DVD people to
despatch the DVD until I have advised them which one in
particular I am after.
This step is comparable to the step of adding detail and sensory
information to your goal statement. You need to spend time
creating a more detailed description of the thing you desire.
Instead of "January 30th, 2006: I have now reduced my weight by
3 kgs" you write, "January 30th, 2006: I am delighted and proud
now that I have made really powerful steps to achieving and
maintaining the size, shape and weight that pleases me, by
successfully reducing my weight by 3kgs. I am truly happy at how
easily this was achieved and am grateful to myself for having
successfully compoleted this. I am now developing a more
progressive relationship with myself and expect to reduce more
weight with more ease this following month too."
Following this step means that you have just added your desired
goal and successful outcome to the "Special Life Cart".
The Fourth Step: Where are you? Give your shipping address.
Now that the DVD is in my shopping cart, I have to tell the DVD
company where to send it. This step is the part that ensures
that my ordered DVD is distributed to my location. This now
brings together two key pieces of information into one virtual
place. Without this step, the DVD people cannot send me the
book... because they have no address for the package.
Goal setting is no different. Just as the DVD and my address had
to merge into one database, the goal you want needs to be merged
with your personal information also. Notice that during this
step, it is not the actual DVD that came together with my actual
home; it is simply a representation of the DVD that came
together with a representation of my home.
The same needs to happen with a representation of the thing you
want, and a representation of you. How? You must imagine
yourself achieving that goal; being that ideal weight for
example. It might take a few minutes to really generate the
images in a vivid way. Nevertheless, with the power of
disciplined thoughts, you merge the thing you want, with the
person you are. Your mind is the virtual database where it all
must come together before Life can fill that order.
As you think about your goal now, having it in the positive
form, vividly imagine just what you are going to see, hear and
feel when you get what you want. As you are doing that, turn the
brightness and colours up in your imagination, make the sounds
louder, even add some of your favourite music or other wonderful
sounds and turn up the wonderful feelings that go with it, think
about where in your body those feelings are going to be when you
achieve that goal and really make them more intense.
Then BELIEVE in that which you want. As you imagine that goal,
view it and perceive it like you just know it is going to
happen, in the same way that you know if you drop your cup of
tea, it will fall to the floor. You just know it will happen. So
every time you think of your goal and the sensory rich outcome,
think of it like you just know it is going to happen.
Then think about how will you know when you have achieved that
goal. How will you know?
I once had a client whose main goal was to be wealthy. I asked
her exactly how she would know when she was officially wealthy
and she said that she would have more money. So I asked her if
she thought that if I gave her a fifty pence piece, would htat
make her officially wealthy. "Of course not" was her reply.
'More money' did not turn out to be specific enough evidence for
her having achieved her goal, so we went into the detail of what
she would see, hear and feel when she was officially wealthy. So
get your own brain sure that it knows exactly what to work
towards.
The Fifth Step: Receive Confirmation of your order.
After I filled in my shipping address, it asked for my credit
card info. This is where I pay for what I want.
In setting a health goal, to "pay" traditionally refers to
"dieting," "pounding the treadmill," and so on.
But that can be wrong.
So what is the price you pay? Well, it is not an easy price to
pay. But it is easier than "paying" with unreasonable diets and
fitness regimes. To take the final step in the order process, to
do the last thing required before you receive the order
confirmation, is to allow yourself to experience the feelings
you feel when the goal is achieved. It is easier said than done,
but you need to take your imagination exercise just one step
further; let me give you an example:
You are out at a social summer event with friends, wearing that
new dress or that favourite pair of trousers, huge grin on your
face, you can smell the air and it smells sweet, you feel a
sense of freedom in your tummy as you move your body and you can
see your friends expressions on their faces looking at you
excitedly. As you meet some friends that you have not see for a
while, they tell you how amazing you look to have reduced your
weight. You look over at your proud partner and you whisper to
them "I did it! It has been tough at times, but I did it! Let's
really enjoy ourselves today!" And your partner says "You really
did do it, I am so proud of you and what you have done."
This is your price. Ensure that you get into your imagination
and associate with your results. Do NOT watch yourself doing it,
BE you doing it.
Now, if you really do spend some time generating those kinds of
images and thoughts in your mind, and feel the excitement and
enjoy gratitude for the success then you are there! You have
paid for your goal. Then as those feelings develop and enhance
inside of you; that is your confirmation. Trust yourself and
your unconscious mind to keep its promise, and go about your
life in peace. No need for desperate dieting; you have already
paid the price. Go about your life with a calm assurance that it
is already done. Then go about your goal sensibly. The results
are on their way and will connect with you in a natural way as
you go about your day to day activities. Simply follow the
thought. Think about new behaviours that you will need in order
to succeed and begin to generate them.
The Sixth Step: Expect Success to Arrive, and be ready to let it
in.
After my bill was paid, and I received my order confirmation,
the DVD was on its way. I needed only to expect it, wait for it,
look out for it, refrain from cancelling it, and answer the door
when it arrived.
One very powerful thing to do here is to now let go of your
goal. Detach from the outcome.
When you really, really want a specific outcome or really,
really want a particular dream, your system sometimes tenses up,
and it becomes increasingly hard to achieve it. Instead, find a
way to become relaxed with the notion of not getting it. This
maintains a sense of relaxation and acceptance while you are
moving towards your goal. Imagine your goal as actual "thing"
and imagine letting go of it, cut the ties that bind it to you
and let it happen unconsciously without you having to
continuously engage in conscious thought processes about it.
As for your goal to reduce your weight by 3 kgs by the end of
January, if you have gone through the entire order process, and
you have received confirmation, all you must do is expect it,
look out for it, refrain from cancelling it with unbelief, and
when opportunity knocks (because it will), simply answer the
door.
Celebrate The New Year In Style!
So finally: The Seventh Step: Celebrate your successes!
People need to celebrate more, so celebrate your successes. Not
just the big goal, but every milestone along the way. If you
want to slim down, celebrate every few pounds lost (with
something that supports you, like new clothing, not chocolates.)
If you want to be a healthy non-smoker, celebrate your first day
smoke-free, then your first week, first month etc. If you want
to - celebration sends a strong sense that you are doing the
right thing to your neurology and makes it easier and more
enjoyable to continue replicating your success.
About the author:
Adam Eason is a UK based consultant, speaker and best-selling
author. Please visit his website for a vast range of resources
from the fields of hypnosis, NLP, personal development and human
potential and to receive your amazing, free, instantly
downloadable hypnosis session for ultimate relaxation:
http://www.adam-eason.com Thank you.